she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
