Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
