my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Randomize
