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• (678): View more from Georgia

  Please, let me fuck your mom

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.

  Fav 11 5488 799

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (936): View more from Texas

  She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (516): View more from New York

  VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR

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• (909): View more from California

  It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.

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• (631): View more from New York

  Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis

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