I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Still dying that you shit outside
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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