and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
