never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
