If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize