Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
