p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
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