Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Randomize
