on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I don't think brook has ever known best
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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