got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
