Whatcha textin bout Willis?
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Randomize