I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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