I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
