does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
