YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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