Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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