So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
