My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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