Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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