My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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