If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
