in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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