that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
