hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
