We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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