if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize