i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
