I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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