belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I need water and some morals
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
