So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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