she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
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