you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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