so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
