stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
