If i come over, it means nothing
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
