oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
