Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize