he wants to bone in the snuggie
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
