Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
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