There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize