I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Randomize