ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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