My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
