I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
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I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
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I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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