please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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