im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
