My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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