i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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