It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
this boner is exhausting
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
